Picture this, you're 10 years old, running across the gravel field at the back of your elementary school. It's an intense game of tag. You have been spotted as a prime target, and the "it" man is after you. You run as fast as you can, changing direction to throw them off, but the chase is on. You look down at your feet, urging them to go faster, and notice a shoelace has loosened itself and is flapping in the wind. You refocus on the task at hand, but the pursuer is gaining on you. In one last desperate attempt to escape, you decide to use your shoelace as a scape-goat. "Time out!!" you scream. You kneel down, and take your time re-tying your laces, hoping your pursuer will lose interest in you and move on to someone else, hoping also to catch your breath. As playground code-of-conduct goes, you always honour the time-out. So the "it" man waits patiently. You stand back up. Shoelaces done. You glance at your pursuer. You yell "time in!" as quickly as you can while in the process of running away, hoping for a head start. Knowing in your head, eventually you're going to get caught.
Life has been feeling a little like a game of tag lately. Coming to the end of my degree (I'll have a BSc by the end of the summer!!), the actual real world, beyond the university classroom, is in full pursuit. My life is waiting to begin a whole new journey, but the fear of being in that spot is causing me to run as hard as I can away from it. Sometimes I wish I could just have a time out. I need time to catch my breath. Gather my thoughts. Time to determine a game plan. Maybe I wish my life had a play book. Whatever life threw at me, I could have a practiced response to take on any situation. But then I think, what fun would that be? Where would the spontaneity of life be? Life is not intended to be preprogrammed responses to events. I need to just take life as it comes and learn and grow with every new experience. And I know God will be with me every step of the way.
I'm just nervous about what the future is going to bring to me. Nervous, but also excited to see in what ways will I be stretched and changed into a better and stronger person.
