Journeying On

"Let the treasures of the trial

Form within me as I go
And at the end of this long passage
Let me leave them at Your throne

 May this journey bring a blessing

May I rise on wings of faith
At the end of my heart's testing
With Your likeness let me wake"

It's that time of year again. Time to reflect on the past year, contemplating what went well and what we wish could have gone better. Time to anticipate the future with excitement and wonder at what the coming year will bring. Time to appreciate the present for what it is, and to use our time well. 

2011 has been a big year for me. Looking back on it brings a lot of joy, but it also brings much sorrow. Through all the highs and the lows in the journey of 2011, God has been walking alongside me, guiding me through the tempests, and blessing me with once-in-a-lifetime opportunities.

The year started with applications to grad schools for worship music. Actually I only ended up sending in one application for a program suited mostly to what I was looking for - at Calvin Seminary of all places. Never would have thought I'd end up there. There were a few hiccups along the way with parts of my application missing, and worries of not receiving financial aid, but everything has fallen into place and I'm enjoying my time in Grand Rapids so far. Not necessarily the classes always :) but I'm having fun, which is the most important part, right?

In February, I was in a car accident and totaled my first car. A lady in a minivan ran a stop sign in the snow, so it wasn't my fault, but the damage was bad enough that the car wasn't worth fixing, so it was replaced with a satisfactory cheque from ICBC. Two days later, my uncle was in a serious head-on collision with a truck, which put my small accident into perspective. God protected him and it's a miracle he's still alive. It's even more miraculous that he's walking and has no brain damage. It has been a long year and long recovery, but things are starting to look up.

I finished my degree officially in April, but ended with a coop job anyways, so the school work was done last August. I was able to have my first cap and gown experience at SFU and graduated in June. Before this happened though, another tragedy struck, and a friend, coworker, and classmate (all one person) committed suicide just before his final exams. As part of my grieving process, I found release in donating my hair to make wigs for cancer patients. It was something I've always wanted to do and I was able to cross it off the bucket list. I did it as well in support of a friend who had lost her mom that past November. She had shaved her head for donation, but I was not bold enough to do that. I had enough to give 10 inches and still have some left for me. After that whole experience, it felt like a weight had been lifted off of me, and now every time I think of haircuts, I remember Wakhile and Caitlin.

Ever since traveling to Europe in grade 12 with the school, I have wanted to go back and do things my own way. I found out in that trip that I'm not much of a tour person. I'd rather plan my own holiday and do the things I want to do and have my own adventures without someone telling me when I have to go to this museum or explore that old building. I love The Amazing Race, and planned my own trip with that in mind. My sister was able to come with me, which was exciting, and we're both pretty adventurous and spontaneous, so our travel styles work well together. We spent months figuring out where we wanted to go, but left ourselves with enough leeway to make changes on the fly. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life and probably the thing I am the most grateful for in 2011. See previous and future blog entries for more specifics on my travels.

3 days after returning from Europe, I was on my way to Grand Rapids Michigan, with only 2 suitcases and a box of winter clothes. My roommate is fantastic and I'm having a great time and meeting great people there. I can't believe I'm already 1/4 of the way done!

In November, I had to say goodbye to my Grandma. I miss her so much, but at the same time I know she is in a better place and a better state. In a way, we said goodbye 4 years ago as Alzheimer's wore down her memory. Every time I would see her, I'd say goodbye as if it were the last time. That's 4 years of final goodbyes. It is a mercy to know that she is in her Father's hands and that she is completely herself, as she was meant to be, in heaven. 

And now the Christmas season. It's great being home, even though I had dental surgery a few days ago to get my wisdom teeth removed - just something that had to be done.

Here's to the coming year, with all the excitement it will bring. Even in good times and bad times, God is here with us, walking alongside us, picking us up when we fall, and carrying us when we lack the strength.

Blessings on 2012.